Personal ideas and opinions.
No, you don't have to use the buffs, but when has that mattered really? I can't remember a time when Thade and I went out to exp where we didn't do the buff bot dance before leaving town. And you know what? It was a pain in the ass, and it wasn't fun even when things went right (omg taru don't cast rbow yet!) I suppose "if you don't like it, lump it" is always valid argument here, but also I think that too many uninformed players get in trouble for 3-box-LD over buffs. Full raid buffs aren't necessary for XP, but it IS common practice for people who have them available and saying otherwise is just bullshit.
I've been thinking about this on and off all day and the best solution I could see was to add a utility NPC to the Majordomo that could be added to the player house. This NPC would have 15 "buff slots" that could be set by any player character. If you spoke to the NPC with a cleric, for instance, you could chose from a list of cleric buffs and it would check if the cleric had the buff, if they have SB (and if so ask if the buff SHOULD be SB) before assigning it to a slot. Any slot should probably become reset after a period of time (maybe a day to a week.) This would still require anyone using this system to have access to the buffs and would be only accessible in town, but would reduce the number of times a person would have to log on their personal buff army. This would function kind of like a short-term Public Storage for buffs. It create a system that would make buffing simpler (once your buff list is set, buffing would take a matter of seconds) and would also avoid the bag slot issues other suggestions have faced which used clickies.
I know one of the many arguments against NPC buff bots in the past has been that (relic) buffs are valuable and this would cut into player income. That said, players could still sell their buffing services individually as they do now or potentially for a increased fee to save them at a player's House (though this would certainly diminish their value.) Another is the value of the class to a group, but with the limitations of house keys, this I think this would only effect players doing their town buffs.