black bread, preferably rye
right, so this is snack that i like to have when drinking VODKA. buy lard, im sure you can get this at any local butcher shop or if not there, at a store that specializes in russian/ukrainian foods. i prefer the smoked type without any additional seasoning besides pepper. also buy wild pickled garlic or "cheremsha" or ramson as its called in your bloody english. slice the lard into VERY VERY VERY thin slices (important - read VERY THIN). take a stalk of ramson and cut it into pieces about 1 inch (2.54 centimeters long) wrap the THINLY sliced lard around the ramson and top it off with a some spicy mustard ( NOT wasabi or any asian stuff) has to be real mustard, not the sissy french kind. additionally you can sprinkle a lil bit of salt on the lard. also the lard has to be refrigerated before serving, so its nice and cool and not melting all over the place.
drink your shot, eat the lard-ramson roll and have a bite of small bread - mm mm goodness. and i know thade is gonna comment on this, so fuck you in advance, thade.
goes best with vodka and moonshine and helps you tackle more of the drink as the fat nicely coats your stomach in a protective shield.
This thread has gotten WAY off-topic: "Cooking with Tyrone". Time to fix that.
1 whole Tyrone
1/3 cup plain distilled vinegar
1 1/2 cup chopped carrots
1 1/2 cup chopped celery
1 1/2 cup chopped onions
1/3 cup sunflower oil
1 tblsp kosher salt
1 tsp thyme
The day before cooking, wash Tyrone inside and out; soak in very cold water with vinegar for a few hours. This freshens and whitens the meat. If Tyrone is frozen, he can defrost during this soak. Sweat the carrots, celery and onions in the oil for 10 minutes, stirring occasionally. The onions should become somewhat translucent, the carrots slightly caramelized. Add salt and thyme. Dry Tyrone thoroughly inside and out. You may stuff Tyrone with the vegetables at this time; however, if you use a conventional stuffing, such as one for a turkey, wait until just before cooking and make certain that Tyrone and stuffing are at room temperature. Suiture Tyrone closed with the vegetales inside. Preheat oven to 450F. Place Tyrone in the roasting pan; he may have to be placed diagonally. Tuck his legs in with his knees to his stomach. Tie Tyrone's arms to his sides with butchers twine and his head facing forward. Place a small piece of wood in Tyrone's mouth, opening it as wide as you can to set the jaw during the cooking process. Bake at 450 degrees fahrenheit for 2 hours, basting every 15 minutes, then lower the temperature to 325 desgrees fahrenheit and bake for another 12 hours, basting every 30 minutes. Remove Tyrone from oven, cover loosely with aluminum foil, and allow him to rest for at least 1 hour. Place Tyrone on serving platter, and replace the wooden block in his mouth with the apple. Any juices remaining in the pan may be used to make gravy. Feeds 30 Gnomes or 2 Trolls for 2 days.